Jokes

MISSY · 05-29-2009, 09:28 PM

Girls at the local highschool were putting on there lipstick and kissing the mirror in the bathroom, the cleaning guy was getting vary upset about this and told the princible about it and the princible called all the girls and told them that this would not be tolerated any more! the next day there was twice as maney kiss marks on the mirror. the cleaning guy was fureous. and went right to the office to report it. the princible gathered all the young ladies in the restroom and wanted them to watch and see how hard it was for the cleaning guy to get it off the mirror. She summond the cleaning guy and he arived in the ladies room and had his spray and a rag and set the spray on the counter and went to the potty and diped his rag into it and rung it out and went over and begane to scrub the mirror, from that day forth no kiss marks were found on the mirror!

geolarson2 · 05-30-2009, 06:50 AM

I'm not 100% sure this is the thread for this, but it got a laugh out of me, so what the hey.

http://www.metro.co.uk/news/article....&in_page_id=34

mart · 05-30-2009, 10:01 AM

MISSY! that has got to be my favourite joke so far.

Must have been a strange world back then Geolarson2 lol.

WhyYou · 05-30-2009, 04:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by geolarson2

I'm not 100% sure this is the thread for this, but it got a laugh out of me, so what the hey.

http://www.metro.co.uk/news/article....&in_page_id=34

Not a typical type of joke, but funny none the less!

mart · 05-30-2009, 08:40 PM

A dumb blonde was bragging about her knowledge of the state capitals of the United States. She proudly announced, "go ahead, ask me any of the capitals, I know all of them.
A redhead said, "O.K., what's the capital of Wyoming?" The blonde replied, "Oh, that's easy, 'W'.

Where do you find a no legged dog?
Right where you left him.

What's the definition of mixed emotions?
When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car

Where do you get virgin wool from?
An Ugly sheep.

What's the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?
The taste!

What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW?
The porcupine has the pricks on the outside.

What's a hindu?
Lays eggs

captnjack · 05-30-2009, 09:19 PM

Pretty good Mart! I wonder what the capital of South Carolina would be. SC maybe?

MISSY · 05-31-2009, 12:49 AM

Do you know why cow's are upset? Well you would be too if the farmer got you up at 5am and stroked your **** for two hours and then left and you didn't get laid!!!!!!

mart · 05-31-2009, 06:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by captnjack

Pretty good Mart! I wonder what the capital of South Carolina would be. SC maybe?

And the capital of England is of cause "E".

MISSY! that's another great joke, keep em coming.

WhyYou · 06-01-2009, 06:09 AM

I got this in an email....

IMPORTANT MESSAGE ABOUT GROWING OLD
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Aww CRAP...Now I forgot what I was going to tell you!

05-30-2009, 10:01 AM	#3
mart Danielle's Only True Love Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Garden of England, Kent Posts: 2,189	MISSY! that has got to be my favourite joke so far. Must have been a strange world back then Geolarson2 lol. __________________ If You Don't Ask, You Don't Get

05-30-2009, 08:40 PM	#5
mart Danielle's Only True Love Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Garden of England, Kent Posts: 2,189	A dumb blonde was bragging about her knowledge of the state capitals of the United States. She proudly announced, "go ahead, ask me any of the capitals, I know all of them. A redhead said, "O.K., what's the capital of Wyoming?" The blonde replied, "Oh, that's easy, 'W'. Where do you find a no legged dog? Right where you left him. What's the definition of mixed emotions? When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car Where do you get virgin wool from? An Ugly sheep. What's the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer? The taste! What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? The porcupine has the pricks on the outside. What's a hindu? Lays eggs __________________ If You Don't Ask, You Don't Get

05-30-2009, 09:19 PM	#6
captnjack Danielle's Imaginary Boyfriend Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: 3rd rock from the sun Posts: 818	Pretty good Mart! I wonder what the capital of South Carolina would be. SC maybe? __________________ But in your dreams whatever they may be Dream a little dream of me

06-01-2009, 06:09 AM	#9
WhyYou Lead Moderator (deceased) Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Joplin, Missouri Posts: 829	I got this in an email.... IMPORTANT MESSAGE ABOUT GROWING OLD * * * * (scroll down) * * * * * * * * * * (keep scrolling) * * * * * * * * * * (more scrolling) * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Aww CRAP...Now I forgot what I was going to tell you! __________________ It's what's inside that counts the most

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05-29-2009, 09:28 PM	#1
MISSY Danielle's Imaginary Girlfriend Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: VA. Posts: 598	Girls at the local highschool were putting on there lipstick and kissing the mirror in the bathroom, the cleaning guy was getting vary upset about this and told the princible about it and the princible called all the girls and told them that this would not be tolerated any more! the next day there was twice as maney kiss marks on the mirror. the cleaning guy was fureous. and went right to the office to report it. the princible gathered all the young ladies in the restroom and wanted them to watch and see how hard it was for the cleaning guy to get it off the mirror. She summond the cleaning guy and he arived in the ladies room and had his spray and a rag and set the spray on the counter and went to the potty and diped his rag into it and rung it out and went over and begane to scrub the mirror, from that day forth no kiss marks were found on the mirror!

05-30-2009, 06:50 AM	#2
geolarson2 Danielle's Imaginary Boyfriend Join Date: Sep 2008 Posts: 512	I'm not 100% sure this is the thread for this, but it got a laugh out of me, so what the hey. http://www.metro.co.uk/news/article....&in_page_id=34

05-31-2009, 12:49 AM	#7
MISSY Danielle's Imaginary Girlfriend Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: VA. Posts: 598	Do you know why cow's are upset? Well you would be too if the farmer got you up at 5am and stroked your **** for two hours and then left and you didn't get laid!!!!!!