*** Danielle's Journal ***

[danielle_ftv]

Feb. 07, 2009
Not much going on lately. Just the same old routine...try to fit in the website, with school, and modeling. I've taken over the running of my site, and am editing all of my stuff. I'm almost done editing all the Hawaii stuff (thank Gawd.) My sister is finally here in AZ. She drove down with my grandma and grandpa, and the little baby. BTW, my nephew is the cutest kid on Earth. Plus he doesn't cry! Or at least I haven't really heard him cry. He actually kind of reminds me of me. He makes funny sounds, weird faces, and squirms around quiet a bit. I took my grandma out on Friday to the Desert Botanical Garden. They had a Chihuly exhibit, which my mom thought would be interesting for my grandma to see. They had Chihuly glass sculpture/bowl things in the gift shop that were selling for $6,100...who buys glass pieces for that much money? I can only imagine buying that, then accidently breaking it . I guess the most expensive nick-nack in my house would have to be my Gemini statue made by Royal Copenhagen...which I just found out I paid twice the price for. I ended up dropping my Italian class. I figure I'm going to do the Rosetta Stone program for whatever language I plan on taking next and then I will be completely proficient in the language and won't have to worry about failing the class. Either that or test out of the language completely (which would be a lot easier.) Tomorrow I have a photoshoot...my first ever pin-up shoot which I am super excited about. Plus there will be a make-up artist and a hairstylist there, which is awesome since I do not know how to do "pin-up" makeup or hair styles.

[danielle_ftv]

Feb. 12, 2009
Yes, yes, yes. I am so happy. I had two tests today in my geology lecture and geology lab. I just got the score back from my geology lab and I got a 92% (the average was 85%....so I got above average). I was completely freaking out about these tests (still kind of freaking out about the lecture test though, since I haven't gotten the score yet.) I ended up studying two days before the test, and also had my personal trainer help me study during our session yesterday night. I didn't study as much as I should've for the geology lecture test...thank gawd we are allowed to drop our lowest score for tests, because I'm thinking it is going to end up being my lowest. Most of the kids in my class said that the test was actually pretty hard. A lot of the questions on the test were about things that the teacher said we wouldn't need to memorize (trickster!) As long as I get above a 75% I will be happy (though I would prefer to get a 90% or above.) I have one more test next week for my math class. I'm actually doing pretty good in that class. It's so funny how you forget everything, then as soon as you start doing it again/learning it again....it all comes back to you. I'm sure I will end up getting a high score on that test. Tomorrow I will be doing my St Patricks and Easter shoot for my website...yes I know it's a little early...but I would prefer to get it done sooner. I'm pretty pysched about it because I bought special toys and special costumes for the shoots, so it should look pretty awesome. Yesterday I had my third webcam show. Surprisingly enough the audio was working! It was a little weird because I had my music playing on my laptop and all of a sudden I heard this peircing echo noise. So I guess I can't play music on my laptop when the webcam is rolling. It was also kind of weird that I couldn't hear myself speak. So I wasn't exactly sure if what I sounded like and if the audio was working correctly. It's a little awkward talking to myself/the computer....I wasn't sure (and still am not sure) if I should just answer questions on the computer or speak the answers. So we have a few more bugs to fix, and then we should be perfect on the webcam. Not sure when they are going to start archiving my shows (I've already done three...so they better get it done soon.) I still have yet to find a doctor that can do tattoo excision. That doesn't seem to be a common thing anymore since they've made the tattoo lasers. I'm hoping to find a doctor sometime in the beginning of next month so I can get it done during Spring Break.

[danielle_ftv]

Feb. 17, 2009
I just got my test score back for my Geology lecture...I passed! I only got a 79%, but thankfully we can drop our lowest score at the end of the semester. The teacher was chewing us out because almost everyone got the "what is plate tectonics" question wrong. Actually half the class didn't pass the test, and the highest score was a 91%, so I guess I did pretty good all in all. I noticed that the questions I missed were of topics from the week of school I missed back in January (Maui trip/shoot.) But hopefully I won't be missing school anymore...actually I can't miss school anymore because I "will be dropped from classes if I have more than 3 absences." I ended up dropping my self defense class...it was just kicking my ***. Especially doing that, my belly dance class twice a week and working out with my personal trainer three times a week. Just couldn't do it. Plus a lot of the exercises/joint manipulations were killing my elbow. So now I'm taking about five classes (geo, geo lab, math, belly dancing, and forensic pathology.) The forensic pathology class is pretty fun....it's self paced so I could potentially finish the class next month if I wanted to. Some of the pictures the teacher shows us in the Powerpoint presentations are pretty gruesome...but it doesn't bother me as much as I thought it would. I have yet to do the autopsy. The teacher said he does it once a month, so hopefully I will get invited before school ends. Unfortunately the problem with going to school is that I rarely have time to hang out with my friends. I actually haven't hung out with my friends in over a month. I can tell that they think I'm neglecting them...but they are all older and have been through college, so they have to understand what I'm going through. At least I'm getting to hang out with my sister and family more. I just met my future step dad's mother and sister. They are pretty nice...not as stuffy as I thought they were going to be. I was pretty quiet around them (because I'm fairly shy around new people) so hopefully they don't think I was being rude. I've finally finished editing all of my stuff for the site. FTV Rob had a HUGE pile-up of stuff that had to be edited. All in all we have 11 professional videos, 11 professional photo sets, 1 candid photo set, and 15 contributing sets. I guess it's nice that everything is edited...but now I don't know what to do with myself. I was doing the editing in my free time (it's actually fairly relaxing and pretty fun as long as I didn't over write stuff or delete important pictures .)

[danielle_ftv]

Feb. 21, 2009
I am never drinking again...will go into details later when my stomach decides to stop giving me problems.

9:26 PM
Okay so my stomach is feeling a lot better. Thanks to all my understanding members who told me that they would understand about me missing my webcam show...but I promise I will always try to make it to the webcam shows. The only reason that I wouldn't be able to make it is if I'm in the hospital or if a family member is in the hospital (or if my laptop is stolen, knock on wood.) The webcam show went great...ended up lasting over two hours! The time totally flew (though Rob is a little upset about me "spoiling" members). It's understandable though...today was not normal at all (webcam shows generally last about half an hour.) I just had a lot to talk about.

Anyways, my friends want me to go out with them again tonight....don't think that's going to happen, and if it does I will definitely not be drinking. Yesterday was the first night in about two months that I actually got to go out to the clubs and party. Well, I've sworn off alcohol (at least until I can forget about this incident.) Ended up drinking way too many gin and tonics (especially since I haven't really drank any alcoholic beverages for a long while.) It was fun though. I needed a night to relax and forget about everything.

A couple days ago I came across a post on this adult forum I frequent. It was a weird post from someone commenting on anothe post that told people to "avoid site at all costs." I couldn't figure out where the original post was posted on (at one point I thought it was on my site, but it wasn't fortunately.) Anyhow, I finally found the post (POST) and boy was I freaking upset when I read it. All I can think is that it's either that FTV hater Eddie Coates or my ex-fiance or his skanky girlfriend. I mean why the hell would someone make a comment like "Danielle doesn't give a **** about her fans"? If anybody who had any brains actually came to this site (or even read my posts on the adult board) they would see how untrue these statements are. I'm still upset about it. I put so much of myself into this website. I try to be nice to everyone (and have apologized to people about things I've said) and to have someone lie about something that means so much to me makes me so freaking angry (and Rob to!) All I can figure is it's either a competitor or someone I personally know that doesn't like me. What also sucks is that the comment is written in my "website review comments" section. There is only one other comment on that board (thankfully it's a positive comment.) But what the heck is going to happen when somebody is thinking about joining my site and reads that post and notices that there is only one other positive comment? It definitely does not look good on me at all. Evil people!

I'm trying to figure out what to do about my "across the US" trip when school ends. I've been talking to Rob about it and unfortunately don't think he would be able to go with me for a month long trip across the US (plus I think we would kill each other after spending that much time together.) And now that I've finally been thinking about it, I'm not sure how I would be able to drive that much. I think I may end up flying to a few different states for about a week, hiring a photographer/videographer (though of course the content won't be as good as Rob's) and driving around the state (and to other states if they are close by.)

[danielle_ftv]

Feb. 22, 2009
BAH....NEED TO GET LAID!!!! I finally caved and bought a 3-day membership to a cartoon porn site and have been masturbating furiously for the past hour now. I've gone looking for other sites...realized that I love goth girls and goth porn. I found a hot gothic/horror porn site that has this amazing hot chick that I really want to fool around with.

[danielle_ftv]

Feb. 24, 2009
I refuse to go to school anymore (jk). Somebody (not sure who out of the dozens of kid in my classes) got me sick. Today everyone was coughing and sneezing (oh wait...that would be me ) and making everyone else who isn't sick, sick. My friend called and told me she has been sick for the past five days now....blah, I guess I have at least another three days of being sick. I got invited to go bowling on Wenesday. I'm so pysched. That's going to be my second (or so) time hanging out with new friends from school. Plus I haven't bowled in forever. I'm sure they plan on drinking, but I will definitely not be drinking since I have school the next morning and that's always terrible having to do anything when you are hungover and sleep deprived. I'm going to Portland, Oregon next month for a photoshoot. That's my second ever out of state photoshoot (my first ever going by myself.) The photographer's really cool (he's the one that did Alison's Studio Colors, Total Hotness Sporty Style, Public Nudity in Portland 1 and 2, among several other.)

[danielle_ftv]

Mar. 4, 2009
So I finally caved and built a Facebook page. Personally I don't like either Myspace or Facebook but I guess it's a good way to "network"...though that would also require me to answer messages (which I don't.) You can find my Facebook by looking up Danielle FTV. I built two...one for FTVGirls and one just for me. And there is also a "Danielle Lover's" fan group on there. I need more friends, so request me people. Yesterday FTV Rob finally caved and let me borrow the GTR. It was so freaking cool! I got to pick up all my friends and they were super impressed (mission accomplished!). We ended up going to a movie and out to eat at The Yardhouse...sucks because I'm not 21 yet and so couldn't drink their awesome beer. We ended up seeing "He's Just Not That Into You" which was like really depressing since I am so like the character "Gigi" in that movie. When I fall for a guy I totally end up sitting around my phone, waiting for his phone call. I end up checking out their Facebook and Myspace profiles and read and look at everything that they put on it. I guess it's kind of stalkerish...but I've always had a "problem" of falling for guys way to quickly and really hard. It's nice though because that movie kind of made me feel a little more "normal"...like my whole Facebook stalking isn't so unusual. Anyhow I have my midterm exam for my forensic pathology class this weekend, my midterm for math next week, and midterm for my Geo lab tomorrow...boy am I freaking out right now. Also you should check out this interview with www.girlnextdoormag.com. I'm on the cover! Not sure why they didn't review my site though (they reviewed FTVGirls instead).

2:49 PM
Yeesssssssss....I just took my online forensic pathology midterm and got an A. So I am averaging an A- in the class right now...so happy.